Oh hey there, 2011.

The Old Year’s gone away
To nothingness and night:
We cannot find him all the day
Nor hear him in the night…

It doesn’t seem like a new year or a new decade or a new anything, really. But it is and that’s the weirdest part. Things are changing and I can never seem to keep up. Whether I like it or not, this next year is going to be vastly different and I’m not sure if I’ll survive. I know that 2011 is going to be a testy one, but to be honest, I can’t really grasp the weight of all these changes.

When I force myself to look into the future at the year standing before me, I glimpse these drastic polarized emotions. Intense sadness, overwhelming joy, blind anger, gripping anticipation, paralyzing fear– all the things I know will be waiting for me in this new year.

But for now, I can’t feel it at all. For now, my mind just keeps on like nothing has changed, like this isn’t the beginning of my ventures into a whole new abyss. It doesn’t seem real. I’m still gripping tightly to all the goodness in 2010 while trying to dismiss all the badness the comes dragging along. I know 2011 is new and unblemished and all of that, but I don’t know if I really see that yet.

Sometimes I have trouble letting go, even when I know I must. 2011, please bring me clarity and peace. Help me put your predecessors back into place so I can greet you properly with bold hope and courageous strength. And please, whatever you do, please don’t pwn me.

To the new year and many epic days ahead!


About Booki
"Somewhere man must know that self-perception is the most frightening of all human observations. He must know that when a man faces himself, he is looking into an abyss."

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